Dear Readers,

It’s the most wonderful time of the year, except it’s not that for everyone.

I really do try to keep it positive and spin things for the good as much as I can but this year has really sucked.

This weekend I attended my second funeral in as many months and that sucked.

One death was expected, the other was not.

To put it bluntly, this year has really been hard for my family.

Because of the unrelenting storm of stress and strife, it’s been pretty hard to find my holiday spirit this year, but I am doing my level best. Watching movies, listening to carols and putting up our tree.

Last week we did our family giving ritual, complete with our own little elf,

That last one usually does it, and again, this year it’s been hard. Especially knowing that so many of my friends are facing job loss, health issues, infertility struggles, and general depression.

So this got me wondering how many of us are walking around with fake smiles plastered on our faces, pretending to be “okay” or even “jolly” when we are anything but?

I think in this season especially, there is TREMENDOUS pressure to pretend all is merry and bright when in fact it’s the opposite.

So what can we do?

First, if you are not okay, acknowledge it and get some help and support.

Whatever that looks like, friends, family, therapy, do what you need to do. That might also mean limiting time with family and friends so you can avoid more stress. See last week’s post about boundaries.

Second, don’t assume everyone around you is holly and jolly. Ask people how they are doing today, and you know, listen.

Finally, be kind to everyone, even if it’s hard, even if they seem angry, you might be the only person who is kind to them anyway. So many people are unpleasant as a defense mechanism (I have definitely been unkind when not at my best) and very often a single act of kindness can turn that tide.

Rules for Success-

1. Be Kind

2. Be Kind

3. Be Kind

-Fred Rogers

Please know, if you are not okay, it REALLY is okay.

Promise.

Think About It.