So if you read my blog faithfully, you know numbers and I share a fractious relationship. I have been working actively to make this relationship better. I think I may have finally hit on something “numbers” and I can agree on. Ready?
Here are some numbers to think about. Most of them make me smile.
13- The first time I thought about being fat
19- My first grown up job
24- The winter I went to Italy and discovered I love the water and getting lost in the streets
31- The year I met the love of my life
36- The year I decided to start loving my body
It’s a measurement, and its a guidepost on your way to a goal. For example. Last week I weighted 253 pounds, Today, after exercise and diet, I weigh 251 pounds. So, somewhere in that time, I burned 7000 calories to lose 2 pounds. I am pausing here to celebrate that I lost two pounds and didn’t gain any weight.
Now, I have a glamorous photo shoot planned in 21 days to commemorate the occasion of my 37th birthday and a major shift in my attitude towards my body. I love my body and do not intend to abuse it any more but rather give it a constant source of love and respect and doing my best block out the voices that tell me I am a fat girl. I am not a fat girl and am getting healthier and loving my body more and more every day. The photo shoot idea came from having more confidence in myself and loving my body enough to say, yes, let’s honor the beauty and physical attractiveness that you are. The 1940s pinups are my favourite and reaching back to a bygone era when women wore hats (love you Grandma) and really embraced being women seems like a great way to celebrate this new found love.
See here for more details as a picture is worth a 1000 words… http://www.lonestarpinup.com/gallery.html
I hope to celebrate a weight loss of 75 pounds in one year. I have not gotten there yet, I have 20 days to go. I plan to continue eating the healthy paleo diet and exercising a hour three times a week to get to my interim goal of 235 pounds. I have 16 pounds to lose and plan to document my progress and am going to work like the dickens to get there but even if I don’t, I will have gotten closer just by trying.
Think about it.
So the other day as I was figuring out the best way to tell my husband that I didn’t want to do something. I considered all the different ways there are to approaching a situation that is unpleasant. Until recently, my favourite and ultimately unhelpful way is to avoid it or hem and haw and avoid the situation as long as possible until you just get pushed into a place where you have to do just blurt it out.
As a frequently loquacious person this bothers me because that approach allows no positioning, no prefacing, and no careful phrasing. I feel a lot like Hamlet(ta) sometimes as I posture and dance and think and vacillate back and forth. But recently, in telling my husband something I was sure he would be angry about, he took it in stride, and it reminded me of how much I am blessed to have married someone who A) knows me well enough to know what I will likely do and say B) Is kind and loving and ultimately very understanding.
So what is my point? Well, its simply this. If you don’t ask for what you want, you will never get it, but if you ask, you just might.
Think about it!
The other night my husband said, “I am tired. Let’s do the dishes tomorrow” and I said, “Yeah, Tomorrow sounds good.”
He quirked one eyebrow at me and said, “you know if we do it together, it will take less time and we can just knock it out.” I said, “Yeah, you are right.” and begrudgingly we both headed to the kitchen determined to be “grown up” and “get it done”. I had been dreading it which is why I was procrastinating all night but you know what, it took less than 10 minutes when all was said and done.
This made me realize something. Doing the dishes is not hard, doing the dishes when you don’t feel like it, cleaning when you don’t feel like it, and paying bills when you don’t feel like it is the definition of maturity. So despite my childish glee over foamy soap (every time, people!) and Rock Star parking, and anything Muppet related, somewhere along the way I started being responsible and its become a habit. I remember fantasizing about how wonderful it would be to be an adult and have unlimited amounts of Swiss Rolls and stay up with NO ONE telling me what to do.
Well, it turns out that being an adult is a lot of fun (more freedom, but also more bills and jobs and responsibilities) but you have to live with the choice of staying up all night (not being productive the next day) or eating all the Swiss Rolls you want (stomach pains and weight gain) so like so many things, you can do whatever you want, but you must face the consequences. Truly it brings to mind something that Joan Ellen, the mother of my heart always says, “You may not want to, but you must”
Think about it!
I have long had a habit of taking things that are unpleasant and finding ways to reclaim them in a positive light.
High school was no picnic for me. But tonight, as my company celebrates all things “high school and homecoming” I take it back as my own. Now, nearly 20 years later, I am married to the love of my life and will be so proud and excited to walk into “the dance” with my husband. Tonight I will be Lorraine Baines, Diane Court, and Eliza Doolittle all rolled into one. All my high school dreams and fantasies come true but it’s going to be better, because it’s not accompanied by all that angst about if the guy I like really likes me. I already know!
What negative can YOU turn into a positive? Think about it!
Okay readers, so I have a confession. Sometimes I get SO excited about what I THINK I can do, I forget to check out all the factors and then realize I have bitten off more than I can chew. If you are unfamiliar with the phrase, maybe a visual will help.
I signed up to do a 13 mile marathon at the end of March, on the strength of two slowly walked 5K’s three months apart. In talking to a few people (you know who you are) I realized this was not only ambitious, it bordered on dangerous. (with apologies to Mr. Izzard) “You’re British, so scale it down a bit”
It is embarrassing to admit this and have to walk back my goal, but here goes. I have signed up to RUN a 5K by mid March. Intermediate goals include, working out two – three times a week. Doing a slow jog for the first half of the 5K on 1/18/2014 and doing intermediate training with a personal trainer including using the tips from Couch to 5K.
I think its important to shoot for the moon and if you fall short of your goal, you wind up among the stars.. but never forget to pack your spacesuit or your oxygen.
I think sometimes in the rush to get things done, we forget that each goal we set has intermediate goals and its just as important to build a foundation of baby steps which then lead you to a larger milestone. If this is obvious to you, congratulations, you are ahead of me.
If it is not, then take a minute and look at that picture again.
Think about it….
Okay, so this picture is of me and some friends before I walked my first 5K. That was kind of a lark, I thought okay a 5K, I have never done one before and if I fall flat on my face… well I won’t post any pictures of that 🙂 That was six months ago and while I have enjoyed a great deal of weight loss and better health, I still have further to go with adding fitness to my diet.. so a friend of mine who is also a personal trainer, laid down the gauntlet and I picked it up.
I just registered to run a 13 mile course in 4 months. I have officially “thrown my cap over the wall” ((http://storiesforspeakers.blogspot.com/2010/09/flinging-your-hat-over-wall.html))
For those unfamiliar with me and my history, running has NEVER been part of it. Walking slowly, yes.. so deep breath and here I go…… I will be taking advice and pointers along the way and will be asking for help (so easy and fun for me, since I LOVE asking for help) (insert heavy sarcasm here…
oh and here is the place where I ask..
I just registered for a 13 mile run…….. am I nuts??????
If you are interested in joining me in this quest, I am running the “Biggest Loser Half Marathon”