31 days of kindness, what have you taught me?

Dear Readers,

Today is the end of the 31 days of kindness but not really.

There was one task set for each day to remind us to be kind. I think we are in general pretty kind people but some of my favourite exercises were the simplest.

“Be kind to yourself”

“Write a thank you note”

“Tip 100%”

No, you can’t do it all the time, but you can “smile at strangers” or “say hi to someone you don’t know” or “pay for someone behind you in the drive thru” ..

In this upcoming season of motherhood, I am patently aware my entire life is about to change (every single person who sees my expanding belly tells me this) and that is scaring the you know what out of me. I have a lot of help, thank God, my community of friends and family of choice is standing by to help and the offers are continuing to be stated for babysitting “if you want me to watch her so you can shower” I will do it. I find my temper shorter these days (with sincere apologies to jeremy, since he is taking the brunt of it) and the normality of it doesn’t change that I regret it. Yes, it’s normal to be irritable but that doesn’t mean it’s okay or acceptable for me to not be “kind” to my spouse or anyone else who is in my path.

So long story short, I am going to do my best to be kind, even when I don’t feel like it (which is pretty often these days)  I am going to do my level best to embrace the fact that I am pregnant and we will have a little bundle of joy very soon. For now, I am going to embrace any last minute date nights we can squeeze in before we are no longer two but in fact, three.

Time is pretty fleeting and we only get the one life.. so I am doing my best to live in the present moment and really take in all that is around me.

What about you?

Think About It….

 

Fan the flames of someone else’s passion!

 

RUmiDear Readers, Today, I had a chance to be someone’s sunshine and I did not take it. I was the rain. I regret it but it was too late to take it back. I tried to ameliorate things but it was too late. My goal is to always fan the flames of someone’s passion, not be the rain shower that says.. “you can’t”.. there are way too many people who delight in that.. so I try HARD to not be one of them, but I stumble and wanting to be honest, I am telling you about it.

I could tell that the light of enthusiasm was dimmed because I decided that “the rules” were more important than the “game”.. I regret this because you truly never get the chance to make a second impression so now this person likely feels slighted or conversely, I am far more obsessed what did or did not go on in this particular interaction.

Last night, I watched my husband win first place in Toastmasters Tall Tales contest and I am so proud of him, and yes I am bragging on him, because I love him but what I love more about him is not that he won, but that he was happier about the reaction his speech caused (moving people) than winning. I strive to be like him in that sense because I struggle with my constant need for recognition. It’s not enough that I did this super great thing. oh, no, I need to get applause and acknowledgment…. Human, yes.. but a flaw nonetheless.. Think about how much more power we have if we simply do amazing things for the pure joy and don’t care about the accolades?  I am reminded of a story of two men in a hospital bed, one near the window who described beautiful scenes of a park with trees and birds and a wonderful panorama of the busy activity outside. The second man delighted in all these descriptions and was heartened by them and looked forward to it every day. Then one day the man in the bed next to the window died and when he did the other man was moved to the bed near the window and as he slowly, painfully raised himself up to see the wonderful sights depicted, he found that the window faced a blank wall. The nurse told him, the man who died was blind. That really makes you think doesn’t it. The first man gave life to strong imagination and likely prolonged his own life as well as his neighbor’s with his vivid imagery.

So will you be the one to paint a pretty picture for someone or will you say, “oh, yeah, there a wall out there.. nothing to see here”

Think About It-

 

You make a difference, don’t doubt it

Dear Readers,thankful

I was talking to a good friend over lunch today and she gave me the most unexpected compliment. “Thanks, you made me feel so much better!”

It made me feel good, valued and most importantly appreciated.. so it made me think about the fact that we are able to spread joy and light or sadness and darkness and it’s a constant choice. Daily, Hourly, and Minute to minute.. you get to choose what wolf you will feed.. the white wolf or the dark wolf (referenced in this parable)

If you want to know more about that- Here is the story-

Two Wolves – A Cherokee Parable

An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life…

“A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.
“It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

“One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt, and ego.

“The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

“This same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather,
“Which wolf will win?”

The old chief simply replied,
“The one you feed.”

 

I got to thinking about that.. and thought not only the one you feed.. (which you choose daily).. but also you surround yourself with people who are feeding the good wolf and you are sure to win at life. We have all experienced that before.. right? You are hanging out happy and hustling and then all of a sudden someone shows up who isn’t having a good day (definitely happens.. and you can’t be happy all the time, life can deal some pretty harsh blows) and not only refused to be cheered up but actively try to bring you down.

Do your best to focus on all the things YOU have to be grateful for and if you can’t change their mind or help them smile.. move on with your day!

You never know what seeds you are planting with your words, so plant/speak carefully.. You don’t always get to see what comes of it, but you might be REALLY surprised by how much you matter. So trust me when I say, YOU DO!

Think about it!

 

 

We really don’t know…

 

ThePlanisnotthething

 

Dear Readers,

I have had a few conversations recently with people about life/work balance and the need to NOT plan everything. Then last night, one of my favourite Toastmasters gave a speech about “keeping your edge and losing the stress”.. a very interesting topic to be sure.

I gave a speech on the topic of “not planning” not too long ago.

To be completely honest, I am still struggling with this as we head into impending parenthood. I fully realize that having a baby means we can plan all we like, but likely the plan is not going to hold.. things are going to go by the wayside or get forgotten but I think as long as I stay true to myself and be who I truly am.. which is an encouraging, positive, realistic person who is always trying to learn… things will be okay.. in fact, not just okay, but pretty  great.

Yes, I have questions about what this next chapter of our lives will yield, but I can’t answer them. No one can. I came face to face with this reality sitting in the prenatal class where medical professionals who have spent YEARS studying the female anatomy and the process of childbirth and they can’t answer any questions which is maddening to me because I have been “question girl” for ALL my life and I revel in it. I have to report that it has stood me in good stead in my career, in my life, and in my relationships. Allow me to state for the record, saying you don’t know is NOT the worst thing you can say.. Sometimes you really don’t, but someone else does.. *usually* and they are equipped to share that knowledge, all that one needs to do is ask… REALLY.

However, I am finding.. the more questions I ask regarding the blessed event to come on September 28, 2016, the less people who I feel “should” know the answers.. just really don’t. They say it with a whimsical smile and shrug of shoulders “we really don’t know” and it’s almost as if they do know but won’t tell me..(paranoia during pregnancy I hear is VERY commond)  but then again, I have to be realistic.. they likely do NOT know.. and don’t want to mislead me.. which I get.. it remains frustrating but understandable.

So when it comes right down to it, I guess I get to wait and see….

Think about it….

32 Weeks Pregnant!!!!!

Dear Readers,

baby32weeks

A picture is truly worth a thousand words.. right?

You know how you know something is true.. but you don’t really “know” it till you ‘KNOW’ it? Well, on Saturday I had that day.. I have been (along with my husband, my mom and some very thoughtful friends, you know who you are!!) collecting toys and clothes and all the other things MiniMac (I am JMac at work.. so my team named her MiniMac which I love)  will be needing and it was only when I got home and started putting things away into her closet and turning off the light and shutting the door to HER room that I bumped into reality..

I AM HAVING A BABY!

Not just an idea of a baby or a dream of a baby or a hope of a baby.. but a real, live, flesh and blood, crying, needs to eat and sleep and cry, talking (eventually) baby! It boggles the mind that Jeremy and I have made a person and she is developing inside my stomach (moving at this precise second, actually, hi little girl!)

It seems ridiculous to type this out and make this realization after 32 weeks of doctor’s appointments, sonograms and other clues.. (you know weight gain despite exercise) the swollen ankles and the cravings..having some trouble sleeping..  to name but a few.. but it’s where I am.

I am excited and terrified (in equal measure) for this next chapter of my life.. as a woman, as a mother, (new title) — and how I will juggle work and motherhood and maintain my sense of self.. It’s a whole new world come September 28, 2016 and I am really excited to meet our daughter, so weird still to type that and think that, I am about to be someone’s MOM!

I can hear her now.. years from now – when she reads this.. going.. wow.. you were really excited to meet me.. Yes, little one we are! We are so excited to be your parents!

So I turn my eyes to you, dear reader! What exciting chapter has just started or is starting in your life? Is your child about to turn 3 years old, are you about to start trying to have a baby? Are you buying a house? Whatever it is, embrace the experience because it’s the life you live and every second it is moving faster and faster.. ENJOY IT!

Think About It…..