Tag: motivation

Thank you for the music…

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Thank you for the music...

(insert ABBA here) Dancing Queen in particular.

When I hear the song, “Dancing Queen” it reminds me of 3 things.
1. When I first moved to Austin, I was staying with a friend who came home to hear me playing it on his cd player and said, “my cd player is confused about its identity”
2. When I was driving from Austin to St Louis and my car died and white smoke came out of the hood.
3. The movie Mama Mia and how much fun I had watching that movie with my good friend Sharon and then the joy I had in getting it as a gift from some dear friends of mine so I could enjoy it over and over again.

and then #4. This morning I heard it while listening to the soundtrack on my ipod nano and working out for the 10th time since the year has begun. It’s starting to get a little easier, and I hope eventually when I work out, I can wear this face you see above as I work out and truly enjoy it like some other people I know. I keep taking it one step at a time and hoping it will get easier and so far it has. Maybe it will also become fun. Who knows!!!

It’s scary till you do it.

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“A life lived in fear, is a life half-lived” A great line, taken from “Strictly Ballroom” which is my favourite movie, ever.

I could be talking about several different things. I purposely write in the most vague way possible to allow for my readers to apply it to whatever they feel strongest about at the moment of reading my post.  In this way it allows you to read into it what you wish.

So for today, It’s only scary till you (fill in your blank) For me, it’s scary to walk/run a 5K. After you have, you know what to expect and how hard it will be and what the challenges and wins are. I myself have not run a 5K yet, I am training for it now. Tomorrow, when I do my work out, in the preparing stage, I will be running for a minute and then walking for one minute. I have done this intermittently but not at a full stretch before. In order to ready myself for this Saturday’s 5K experience (slow jog for the first half and then walk for the second half) this is what I must do. In thinking about that, I realize that at one point or another, everything that I have done that filled me with fear, I somehow “felt the fear, and did it anyway” and after it was done, it wasn’t so scary. A few examples include:

1. Moving from New Orleans to Austin.

2. Changing my major from business to drama

3. Changing my lifestyle to paleo.

So far, these things have all been hard but worthwhile. I am finding that to be true about exercise as well.

Try, Try Again.

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So this morning, I woke at 4:30 (without an alarm, mind you) and still decided to snooze. Mistake #1. I still got up though and headed to the treadmill and did the walking 30 seconds, running 30 seconds thing going pretty well, feeling pretty energetic even though listening to the Beatles, “Carry that Weight” has never been more depressing.. but I digress.. At about the 20 minute mark, I accidentally pulled the emergency switch.. Swearing to myself, I got the treadmill going again and got my momentum back and kept going until I got to 45 and then pulled it again. UGH! This time I was defeated and said to myself, You know what, I am going to take that as a sign that my workout is over. I got off the treadmill and weighed myself. 247. Yesterday it was 246 so I am a little down about that today but I take solace in the fact that I did get up to workout and then DID NOT go back to sleep, despite how badly I wanted to do so.

But, onward and upward, I have 12 pounds to go to make my goal weight, I CAN DO IT!!!

I am headed to work now to start my day and trying hard not to beat myself up. I know its only 15 minutes but I think it will make it that much harder to get back up to an hour again on Friday. I try to be positive as much as I can, but the truth is, sometimes a situation just sucks and all you can do is rise above it. I felt like it was important to report the setbacks as much as the successes. It’s a all a part of the goal and I think sometimes we get so caught up in the success piece we forget there is pain and frustration. So I hope this helps inspire you to keep going with your goal.

Think about it!

4:30 a.m.- The hardest thing I did today was not hit the snooze button

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So this morning, I woke up to my alarm at 4:30 so I could get up and jog/walk on my treadmill. This is not easy and it is not fun.

However, if I am going to continue to lose weight to get down to my goal weight, I have to keep it up.

I have grown to really love my ipod nano (my husband got it for me last year for Christmas) in aid of helping me work out. I used it sparingly and this morning I was really grateful for the fact that I had it to use while jogging 30 seconds, walking 30 seconds. Let me say that again, I ran 30 seconds and walked 30 seconds. I was very grateful that I have the soundtrack to “Priscilla, Queen of the Desert” on my ipod to run/walk to… There is nothing like disco to get the heart pumping.

I did intervals, a new term I am learning thanks to my coach Cole Butler and the online program

http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/2_3/181.shtml

I will say the intervals make it easier for the time to go by but its no less hard. However, I have to compare it to something Jon Acuff said.
When someone questions what you are doing or attempting to do: “Have you ever run a 5K, Jennifer?”

Answer with a smile and say something like this, “No, but I am about to.” Added silently. “Watch me!”

So while I am tired, I am far more alert than I would have been if I had not worked out today and am eager to start the day.

It helps that I lost 2 more pounds (13 to go!!!) but I would not be deterred if I had not, because this is not a diet, this is a lifestyle choice to be healthier. I have said that before but not really meant it. This time I do.

one workout, one step, one pound

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Happy New Year Everyone! I think that as a culture we focus way too much on New Year’s resolutions. I gave a speech last year that focused heavily on “new month” resolutions but I think that it is far more important to make life resolutions. Here are mine

1. Speak with an honest heart and an intent to help

2. Value and cherish my body

3. Realize that everyone makes mistakes and everyone is struggling so to always be kind

4. Really enjoy the moments of life and don’t “wait” to do something or “save” an outfit for a special occasion.

Case in point, I worked out today and while it was difficult and unpleasant it yielded the loss of one pound. I could get discouraged by that but I am not. I am working hard to lose the last 15 pound to make it to my goal in 18 days of 235 pounds. The good thing about that is that once I have accomplished it, I will know that I can and will eventually get down to 175 which is my ideal (medically stated for my height and weight) 

It takes one step at a time, one mile at a time and it’s all working towards the goal of better health in the years to come so the baby steps I take today ( pun intended) will lead me to a longer, healthier life where I don’t get out of breath running up a flight of stairs and I can and will run a 5K. I am not there yet, ( on the slow jog part, but I will get there ).

What have you always wanted to do but haven’t done yet? What steps are you taking to get there?

It’s all in the numbers… really

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So if you read my blog faithfully, you know numbers and I share a fractious relationship. I have been working actively to make this relationship better. I think I may have finally hit on something “numbers” and I can agree on. Ready?

Here are some numbers to think about. Most of them make me smile.

13- The first time I thought about being fat

19- My first grown up job

24- The winter I went to Italy and discovered I love the water and getting lost in the streets

31-  The year I met the love of my life

36- The year I decided to start loving my body

It’s a measurement, and its a guidepost on your way to a goal. For example. Last week I weighted 253 pounds, Today, after exercise and diet, I weigh 251 pounds. So, somewhere in that time, I burned 7000 calories to lose 2 pounds. I am pausing here to celebrate that I lost two pounds and didn’t gain any weight.

Now, I have a glamorous photo shoot planned in 21 days to commemorate the occasion of my 37th birthday and a major shift in my attitude towards my body. I love my body and do not intend to abuse it any more but rather give it a constant source of love and respect and doing my best block out the voices that tell me I am a fat girl. I am not a fat girl and am getting healthier and loving my body more and more every day. The photo shoot idea came from having more confidence in myself and loving my body enough to say, yes, let’s honor the beauty and physical attractiveness that you are. The 1940s pinups are my favourite and reaching back to a bygone era when women wore hats (love you Grandma) and really embraced being women seems like a great way to celebrate this new found love.

See here for more details as a picture is worth a 1000 words… http://www.lonestarpinup.com/gallery.html

I hope to celebrate a weight loss of 75 pounds in one year. I have not gotten there yet, I have 20 days to go. I plan to continue eating the healthy paleo diet and exercising a hour three times a week to get to my interim goal of 235 pounds. I have 16 pounds to lose and plan to document my progress and am going to work like the dickens to get there but even if I don’t, I will have gotten closer just by trying.

Think about it.

Last place is asleep…

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I walked my second 5K on Saturday and it was exciting to me to realize how far I have come in just a few months. My first one was in June and needless to say there have been several things keeping me from this monthly commitment.

But no more, I am actively putting exercise in my life again, because with paleo I feel great, but the weight loss has died down. The answer? Exercise. I also realize that “cheating” on the paleo diet once a week rather than once a day will help too!

I made the comment as I walked up to the administrator, ” I am not last, YAY!” He smiled and marked my time on his computer and said, Last is asleep. It really hit me that even suiting up and walking is better than not being there. Its a great metaphor that can be applied to almost any goal. Give yourself some grace and take baby steps to get there. At least you are in the race!

Think about it.

 

Punch fear in the face

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I am a speaker so what I am about to say may be shocking. I asked to do a speech on November 19th many months ago at my Toastmasters club, I was told that I would be put on a list but as it turns out I am not on the list. Until today, apparently a slot just opened up….

I like to speak but tend to practice a little more than a week in advance!! Fear, sweaty palms (even as I type this, and absolute terror because I was confident in the knowledge that I didn’t have to give a speech. It would have been easy for me to decline but I punched fear in the face and decided to say yes, since I do have a week.. but it got me thinking. It would have been far more prudent to have a speech I was working on ready to go (that way I wouldn’t be making it up out of full cloth) but its a learning experience.. and now, to the archives to look up notes and figure out what I am going to talk about next week.

Have you been asked to do something that you weren’t 100% prepared to do? What did you do? Turn it down? Beg off, saying you were busy or did you decide to bite the bullet and muddle through?

Balance is everything.

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I am going to make this short and sweet since I am on a break at work but guess what!!! ITS CHEAT DAY for my diet.

I was questioning myself and wondering if it was a good idea or “okay” to be THIS excited about processed foods including chocolate and cheese consumption that I am going to do today and realized yes, it is! There is balance in everything. For six days, including Halloween, Renaissance Festival, and a pancake breakfast, I have adhered to the paleo way and its been difficult, but not impossible because we have the balance of a long-awaited cheat day. 

I think that the build-up to that of cheating every other day helped me stay true but really, after you make the decision you are working towards a goal, (the aforementioned 50 pounds lost and resulting photo shoot) the discipline required starts to show up in other things too. I am walking in my second 5K in exactly 9 days and this forces me to incorporate exercise in my routine as well as stay true to our paleo way. What are you working towards? What habits and discipline have you found along the way?

 

Perception is everything.

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Perception is everything.

Dear readers, until a few months ago I called myself fat. I do not do this anymore, okay that isn’t really true. I correct myself when I do say it but its a correction after years of lots of negative self-talk.

I have been thinking of myself as fat for most of my life but really truly, I am not. This picture was taken just before my ninth grade homecoming dance. I remember thinking that thought it wasn’t blue, I really liked the dress and it was a fun evening and I got to buy new shoes and my hair done and it was the first time I started to feel a little bit grown-up.

I have spent most of my life thinking of myself as fat but I am really, truly not. I feel the need to say it at least twice here because of how many millions of times have I said to myself that I am.

Now my husband has been saying to me for years (5 to be precise) that I am beautiful and I have had to really struggle to not set aside his praise as prejudice.

What do you say about you that isn’t true? What can you say today to start turning that around?