What do you do when what you want doesn’t happen?

As many of you know, I was up for a part in a play I adore and was doing everything I could to get picked. I was not picked and while I am upset ( I am human after all! ) I am excited to see what is next on the agenda that I am meant to do because this did not pan out.

Key takeaways from the experience?

1. Be Prepared. I practiced and practiced and practiced and received coaching from people I respect ( you know who you are) and felt extremely prepared, more so than for any audition I have ever had before. Yep, after almost 15 years of acting I just wrote that. Staggering.

2. Think Positive. I used to say Prepare for the Worst, Expect the Best and Adapt to the Outcome but that is such a defeatist attitude.. From now on, let’s just prepare for the best and adapt to the outcome whether its what you want or not.

3. Working hard is important but its not everything. – Sometimes you can do everything right and work as hard as you can but someone else or other factors make the final decision so in that case are you going to gnash your teeth and wear your hair shirt? No. Just work as hard as you can. That way if it doesn’t work out the way you want it to, you can console yourself with the knowledge that you did all you could do to affect a positive outcome.

If nothing else, I had the chance to act and work with others for a night even if it wasn’t for a full run. I often have to remind myself as an actor it’s not my job to get the gig. It’s my job to audition, audition and then audition some more.

What are you working on? What is your dream? Tell me about it? I would love to encourage you on your journey!

2 thoughts on “What do you do when what you want doesn’t happen?

  1. I love this question and the takeaways from what some people might think of as “failure.” I have “failed” many times, and for a long time, thinking about it that way just made me feel like, you guessed it, a Failure (capital F intended). Today, I realize that all of those experiences have created opportunities that never would have been possible. We won’t always get what we want, but with the right mindset, we WILL certainly learn from not getting what we want and hopefully walk away with a mindset that will allow us to reflect and learn from the experience, and keep growing and learning as a result.

    Someone recently told me that they visited Silicon Valley and it seemed everyone they met while visiting seemed excited to share about their most recent “failure” for those who are willing to take risks, and recognize the importance of the process of success, “failing” is a badge of honor. The stories of success don’t usually spend a lot of time discussing the failures it took to get there, but when we peel back the layers, the most successful people have lots of stories to share about their road to success.

    I am currently working on taking my public speaking to new levels. I recently had the opportunity to speak at a local Claim Your Life Seminar and I am excited about the future. I am working on Mastery, and I look forward to doing more “Reps” as Jon Acuff mentions in “Start.”

    Good luck in your next endeavors, thanks for sharing your experience with us!


    1. Thank you so much for your insight. I do enjoy Jon’s references to “reps” and I have been using it to look back on this experience. Make sure you keep me posted on your endeavors as well. I credit Toastmasters with the upping of my speaking game since chatting with Jon at an event last April and he said, “Keep Speaking” even wrote it in my copy of Quitter and that is exactly what I have been doing. Rep, after Rep… — Let me know if I can do anything to help you !


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