Time passes swiftly by …

Dear Readers,
Tomorrow is the 4 year anniversary of the day I married my husband. It was a great day after a lot of stress and planning to make the perfect day.. I tell you this because I think its important to look back and say, If I had it to do over again, I wouldn’t change anything but I might not stress as much.. There is no such thing as a perfect day but this came darn close. My family and friends went out of their way to make it wonderful.

You know who you are, but in case you don’t!

Alexandra Russo- breakfast, hosting the rehearsal dinner, and last minute detail work on my dress!

Rachel Meissner- all the care and love you put into helping me pick out the flowers and the dresses and hostessing the shower and helping keep me sane and… I could go on and on.. but you know how grateful I remain even now.

Jennifer Durbin- You hosted a wonderful bachelorette party that was EXACTLY what I wanted and also kept me sane during a crazy crazy time!

Jessica Brill- the one true SWADIC- helped me with so many details I have lost count including but not limited to the not stressing (goldfish be gone!) over and over again

Joan Ellen/Mom- words don’t begin to cover it, not only did you make my dress, drive in to finish said dress, keep me sane through the entire process and continually remind me that the dress was just one piece and to enjoy my day and not “stress the small stuff” and its all small stuff”

The common theme here is stress or worry– you always worry about the things that don’t happen– and some of the things you NEVER worry about come to pass and there is no predicting it so what is the point? Well, I guess what I am trying to say is that if you have an event coming up (doesn’t have to be a wedding) that you are stressing over, use the 2, 2, 2 rule, oh you don’t know that one.. well let me advise you what I mean.. If you are stressing, ask the question

Will this matter in two hours? Will this matter in 2 weeks? Will this matter in 2 months?

Think About it.. as you can see from this picture.. it all worked out great! IMG_0001 - Copy

Happy Anniversary Jeremy!

It’s all about perspective….

Dear Readers,

I talk a LOT about perspective on this blog, but you know its an important topic.

If you are someone who is starting a new diet, your perspective might be, “wow, I have a really long way to” but a better way to look at it is. “I am starting something new that is healthy and will take time for me to figure out how to do well”

If you are someone who is planning to run a 10 mile race in three months (insert scream here) you might say.. “gosh I haven’t worked out nearly enough to get to that goal.. but a better way to say it “I have thrown my hat over the wall and made a financial commitment to be more responsible about my health and that will take time and patience”

If you are someone who auditioned for the show “Chicago” with dreams of singing and dancing to “All That Jazz” and didn’t get a callback or the role, you might think, I should just give up, show business is so hard and its really unforgiving, a better way to look at it is. “I held my own with career dancers and brought it with a song” I may not be what they are looking for right now, but one day soon, I will be, I just need to keep working and playing and auditioning and studying and treating myself as the artist I am and it will lead to wonderful things.

So if you are not feeling particularly Pollyanna or Tony Robbins at the moment, I hear that, (that is kind of why I wrote the blog today to snap myself out of a funk) just don’t stay in the funk, take a beat and think about what you can reframe or change in your kaleidoscope and find the best possible way to look at it and think of this…. and be sure to yell, that is the best part of this advice! IMG_0258

Don’t be afraid to delete!

How often do you read a message and feel the pressure to keep it “just in case”? Well I am here to tell you here and now, that anything you need to keep, you put in a folder.

I have been looking for ways to simplify and declutter my life and one of the most recent tips was to archive and and categorize your emails. Take the time to unsubscribe from those emails that waste your time. I did something crazy. I deleted everything in my inbox and you know what? The sky DID NOT FALL.

It was a staggering 5061 emails. Because I so heartily detest text messages, I get more than most. I don’t tell you this to impress you, likely you have more or slightly less but I feel so much better when logging in now and seeing what I need to deal with NOW and if it can wait, I will make sure to respond in a week or its deleted.

I think for most of us, the intent to respond is there but we are so locked into, I will respond later, but we never do. Unless its something you need to take action on or save for future reference (how strict you are on that is entirely up to you) DELETE IT! and don’t look back!

How much time could you free up by doing this? Think about it!

Are you really too busy?

Seems like a simple thing.. and it is but a lot of us get caught in the trap of being busy, we say it all the time. I am busy, I can’t make it I am busy.. oh I would love to, but if I weren’t busy…. You get it.

But ask yourself, what are you too busy doing? Are you busy following the dreams that matter to you? Are you saying you are too busy to avoid a confrontation?

You know, we all have the same 24 hours. Some are working two jobs, some are new mothers, some are mothers of 2, and you don’t have to be a mom to be busy. You can be single and be busy with pursuing your career. You can’t exactly say,”I really don’t want to spend time with you, and our friendship isn’t strong enough to support one on one time”, but due to the niceties of society that we are all conditioned to support, we don’t say that, because, A) its rude B) we don’t want to admit we have failed that friendship by pretending its something its not but are unwilling to move on. We all make time for the things that matter. I am guilty of this problem which is why I am posting about it, I struggle with making time for the things that matter, but sometimes I just sit and watch netflix because that is what I really WANT to do.

I want you to think about it the next time someone asks you to do something. If you don’t want to do the activity, pick another activity and suggest it. If you are already committed for that time, suggest another time, Committed is a very different word than busy. Busy is flabby and unspecific. 

If you don’t want to spend time with the person think about why.. and then decide if its time to tell them (hard truth time!) or to just say you are busy. I don’t expect that one post can change the behavior of an entire culture, I just think its worth examining what you are “busy” doing.

What’s the point? Life is short, spend it with people you care about.