The Ripple Effect

When you throw a pebble in a pond, do you watch the rings form and do you ever count how many there are as the water slowly stills?

I was thinking about that yesterday as I was helping a customer with a difficult problem. Every person has the same chance to make a difference. You decide whether to be a force for good or evil. That is a little black and white so let me quantify it better by using math. You can add or you can subtract.

When you lift people and support their dreams, you add.
When you say things like, “you can’t do that” “that’s silly” you subtract.

Be an good pebble,not a bad pebble. you have no idea how far out your rings extend.

Who knows, you could inspire the next Maya Angelou, Elizabeth Barrett Browning or Mahatma Gandhi.

Think about it!

Stop and take a look around you, you may be missing your life…

As an actor, I spend a lot of time thinking about being present and “in the moment” but its not exclusive to being an actor. It’s a great way to be a human as well.

Over the last seven days, I have had the opportunity to really take in life and my surroundings in cool and comfortable Portland, Oregon, and Camas, Washington, and Lewiston, Idaho. We went to the beach, we went to the mountains, we drove near a waterfall and every single place we looked at or drove through had the same reaction. “Wow” “How beautiful” and while I wanted to capture every moment with my camera (read Iphone), I actively did not. I wanted to live through the experiences I was having and I think I did that. I still took pictures but not nearly the volume I would have in the past. In fact, as a result of the trip, I decided I will take the photos and put them in a photo book which will allow me to add the ticket stubs and programs from the events we went to. If I was posting every five minutes on Facebook, I don’t think that thought would have been born. Think about it.

The irony that you are reading my post and then heading to a link, does not escape me, but Social Media can be good. As people far smarter than I have penned, everything in moderation. I have seen lost animals and people found by use of its ability to get information out there as quickly as possible. Take five minutes and watch this and then look up from whatever you are doing and go outside and enjoy the Vitamin D that is available to you and the life you are in fact living.

Think about it!

People are much nicer than you think, just look around! Spread Kindness!

Dear Readers, Happy Friday and I hope you are enjoying your day!

I went walking on the Mueller Lake Trail on Sunday and was not with my workout buddy as she was in Chicago enjoying the sights. So I had on my Ipod and was running and walking and running and walking and noticing people giving me slightly perceptible looks of encouragement, thumbs up, and in one case a high five after I did a sprint, I even had a groundskeeper look on and say are you okay, as i passed him after some exertion, I smiled and said thank you (gasping)

This encouraged me to keep moving, but more importantly, it was an opportunity to engage and nod and thumbs up and high five others who might have needed it just as badly as I did. It struck me then how many times we focus on how awful and evil the world is when that simply isn’t true. Inherently, people are good and they want to help others. There are definitely bad apples out there to be sure, but try not to let a rotten one or two on a branch stop you from seeing the whole tree.

 

Think about it!

And while you are “thinking about it” do something too.. My friend and World Champion of Public Speaking, Ryan Avery is doing a 31 days of kindness challenge #31daysofkindness (for more details see below)

For my birthday, I typically don’t ask for presents, I ask people to do random acts of kindness and then tell me about it, leaving it open to the giver what they want to do.. There have been some pretty creative ones. Buying broke students pizza, paying for someone’s coffee. Really think about what you can do (doesn’t have to cost money) to make the world better. Sounds pretty daunting till you think about one step YOU can take, then it seems pretty easy!

http://ryanavery.com/join-us-for-the-31-days-of-kindness-challenge/

You are the only variable..

Dear Readers, I got to thinking today about what that statement means.

In this life, we have 24 hours in a day and with this finite boundary we decide where to “budget” the time.

After almost two years of solidly budgeting our money, I have come to realize what a precious commodity time is and will be looking at it more along the lines of money moving forward. For instance, I will put a limit on how much time I am willing to spend with those who are not committed to living their lives with purpose and intentionality towards good. I will also limit the amount of time spent complaining about a situation instead of doing something about it. I will spend less time worrying about what other people think and focus on making a difference instead.

I will spend more time smiling.
I will spend more time being happy and less time worrying.

But mostly, I will spend more
time being with the people I am with and focusing on how to help them find and follow their dreams.

What time are you losing or squandering? Think about it!

Balance is everything

I had coffee with a friend last night and while talking I realized we don’t agree on finances. Not the end of the world, and we can certainly talk about a myriad of topics without bumping into this but it struck me later that one of us said, “I don’t agree with that” and I found myself probing to better understand the point of view alien from my own. I think it was Einstein who said it best, “The definition of intelligence is being able to hold two opposing viewpoints at the same time.” I may be grossly paraphrasing it but no matter, someone will be along to correct me shortly.

Seriously though, with all the negative vibes and judgment surrounding the recent Supreme Court ruling “you must be crazy to think that” I think we miss a huge opportunity to educate, not necessarily to change their mind but to make things more clear.

How many people are willing to ask questions about something that is almost sure to start a controversial discussion and admit that they don’t have all the answers. I certainly don’t and will assure you that I would rather soak things up like a sponge than ask a question and get doused with a bucket of hate. Sadly, this is often the case.

So what am I saying? Balance is everything. The next time someone asks you a question or says something you completely disagree with, I challenge you to say, “That is interesting that you say that, can you tell more about why you feel that way?” Here’s the kicker, you have to really listen to their answer and seek to not necessarily agree but come away with new information.

Think about it!!

Meet yourself where you are.. now and later..

Hello friends,

I come to you once again to say.. meet yourself where you are. I have said this before, but its so important I thought it bore repetition. For example, I want to give a Ted Talk by this time next year.

That is scary saying out loud and then here I go putting it in black and white but there you go.

I can hear you saying, that sounds great Jennifer and you are awesome and all but how do you plan to do it?

Great question and I am glad you asked.

1. Don’t reinvent the wheel, if someone has already done it, read about what they did and if possible get an audience with them to find out the nuts and bolts

2. Do your own research. For instance, did you know that Ted speakers do not get paid, the prestige is what you are after and of course the opportunity to go viral for all the right reasons.

3. Work backwards. Some of the best advice I have ever gotten is from a noted director who said to me, when I asked him (quite the upstart am I) “What is your best advice for directing a play?” He said plan your schedule backwards, Opening Night is August 22nd. work backwards from there.

4. Be patient and curious about what you discover along the way to your goal. You may find that your goal changes or leads you to a new goal. Case in point, Healthy living for me has led to 5K pursuit I never even thought was in my reality and now I have done three of them.

5. Get accountability partners or someone you trust to help you stay the course or work on your goal.

Sometimes that can be you… Let me explain, there is no time. Let me sum up-

You can write a letter to yourself and have it delivered in the future- It’s kind of awesome to think that the motivated you of today can help propel future you forward!

http://www.futureme.org/

Think about it!

 

The way it is….

Dear Readers, I try my best to be positive but there are times when even this Pollyanna gets down.

Today is one of those times. I won’t share much except to say that we all have things in our lives that no amount of positive things that you say, do, or think about it will ever change what it actually is. Reframing is the only option. Harder than it looks to be sure, and I am struggling with that right now.

Sometimes facing that reality and giving up the fantasy of what you wish were true is the hardest part. Having an active imagination makes that job 10 times harder. 

Try as I might, things will not resolve to my satisfaction so I have to put on a happy face and focus on what I can control and change how I look at it and see it for what it really is.

I promised to be authentic with you when you followed me, so for today, this is the way it is.

 

Reframe and Reclaim

JenReframe

Rejection, no matter what your field, sucks. For the purposes of this post. I will approach it from the field of the actor.

The five stages of grief look a little like this.

Denial- “I must have heard the message wrong. I nailed that audition, they must have mixed me up with someone else.
Anger- “How dare they not cast me. I am awesome.”
Bargaining- “Well maybe they wanted to cast me but some political machinations got in the way”
Depression- “why even try? Look, I went for it and didn’t get it. I must not be good enough to get that part. They must know something I don’t”
Acceptance- “I didn’t get the part”

I realized something during this last cycle of Grief. Its all in how you frame it. For example, the picture you see here is me eagerly anticipating my po-boy sandwich and how excited I am to eat it. I choose to remember that feeling and not how I felt after it turned out to not be so good (didn’t think that was possible) and the fun I had with my husband later in the day.

Further, I choose to remember that he was willing to take that picture not that he hates to take pictures and refused to be in my pictures.

I think a lot of people would say that I live life looking through rose-colored glasses. I actually do see life the way it really is, I just choose to frame it through a rose-colored lens.

All of us have something in our past we are unhappy that happened to us. It is vital to not let it define you. So I say this to you. Reframe and Reclaim it as a learning experience or take something away from it that makes it yours, not something that happened to you. Happen to it. Take it back.

Think about it!

Your dream is a lot bigger than you are…

Dear Readers, Thank you for reading my blog. I know you don’t always comment but I know many of you are reading it and have met a few of you lately who have taken the time to tell me how much it helps you to know I am working out or working towards my goals and in turn it helps you to take one more baby step towards your dream.

Kermit the Frog said it best “Well, I have a dream too, but it’s about singing and dancing and making people happy. It’s the kind of dream that gets better the more people you share it with. And I found a whole group of friends who have the same dream, and that makes us sort of like a family.”

It struck me today how much it helps to have people to share a dream with and the more people you tell about it the more people can and WILL support you. As for the ones who don’t well they are just mad that they didn’t go after what they wanted. That’s about them, not you.

Make sure you ask for help and tell lots of supportive, positive people about what you are up to. They might surprise you with what they have to offer to help you get to where you are going.

Think about it!

Change one thing. Change Everything.

Dear Readers, Today is the day of my week I look forward to the most. Today is cheat day on my diet. Most days I am (along with my husband) eating a paleo diet and I experience the joy of weight loss, energy and overall good health forsaking all those foods that my former fat girl self loved and adored. How did I get here?

I gave up soda. It sounds harder and yet was easier than I thought.

I work in a wonderful place that offers free sodas as one its many, many perks but they don’t have my favourite soda so I justified it like that. I said, okay well they don’t have what I want so I will decide to do without it. After a week without it, I no longer thought about it.

The next thing I gave up was chocolate and the same thing happened. I no longer thought about it after not having it all the time and so on. After we had adapted to the paleo lifestyle for a month, we had a glorious meal full of all the foods we loved and had temporarily given up. It was delectable and oh so very choice. I remember that meal and it was one night over a year ago.

Today, though it is cheat day, I am actually planning to only cheat with one meal instead of three, baby steps, people!

Expand your imagination, and find one thing that you have been talking about doing something about  it, today!

Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness, concerning all acts of initiative (and creation). There is one elementary truth in ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

 

Do it, and watch what happens.